So You've Been Publicly Shamed

1. Public shaming has made a comeback in the digital age

After a lull of almost 180 years (public punishments were phased out in 1837 in the United Kingdom and in 1839 in the United States), it was back in a big way.

Historically, public shaming served as a primary tool for social control, designed to enforce communal standards by humiliating those who violated them. Although these practices were largely abandoned in the 19th century due to their perceived cruelty and lack of efficacy, they have experienced a significant revival through social media. The internet has reintroduced these dynamics, now amplified by global connectivity and the lasting nature of digital content.

In the modern era, this resurgence manifests in several ways:

• Online call-out culture: Publicly identifying and criticizing perceived social or moral failures.
• Viral exposure: Utilizing social media to broadcast the wrongdoings of others to a massive audience.
• Cancel culture: Systematic efforts to deplatform or ostracize public and private figures.
• Harassment and doxxing: Targeted campaigns that often involve releasing private information.

This technological shift allows individuals to participate in shaming with minimal regard for the proportionality of the punishment or the specific context of the situation. Consequently, the targets of these actions often face severe personal and professional damage that persists long after the initial event.

2. Social media has amplified the power and reach of public shaming

We were at the start of a great renaissance of public shaming. After a lull of almost 180 years (public punishments were phased out in 1837 in the United Kingdom and in 1839 in the United States), it was back in a big way.

The infrastructure of social media has fundamentally altered the scale of shaming. Information now spreads with a viral speed that can transform minor personal errors into international scandals within hours. Unlike the physical punishments of the past, online shaming creates a permanent digital footprint, ensuring that a person's mistakes remain accessible indefinitely.

Furthermore, the digital environment fosters a mob mentality. The distance and anonymity afforded by screens can encourage collective aggression, where participants contribute to the shaming process without assessing the long-term impact on the individual targeted.

Several technological and social factors drive this amplification:

• The technical ease with which content can be shared and redistributed.
• Platform algorithms that prioritize highly engaging or provocative material.
• The formation of echo chambers that validate and intensify collective outrage.
• The inherent lack of nuance and context in short-form digital communication.

3. The consequences of online shaming can be devastating and long-lasting

"I had a great career and I loved my job and it was taken away from me and there was a lot of glory in that. Everybody else was very happy about that. I cried out my body weight in the first twenty-four hours. It was incredibly traumatic. You don't sleep. You wake up in the middle of the night forgetting where you are."

The impact of digital shaming on the individual is often profound and traumatic. Victims frequently report severe psychological distress, including anxiety, depression, and significant social isolation. Professionally, the repercussions are often immediate and enduring; many lose their livelihoods and find that their digital reputation serves as a permanent barrier to future employment.

The long-term effects of being shamed online include:

• Strained or broken personal relationships.
• Persistent fear of being recognized or re-targeted by the public.
• Economic instability resulting from the loss of professional standing.
• Deep-seated psychological trauma that may require long-term therapeutic intervention.

Because the reaction of the online public is often disproportionate, a single lapse in judgment can lead to life-altering consequences that far exceed the severity of the original act.

4. Shame is a powerful emotion with deep psychological impacts

"Universal among the violent criminals was the fact that they were keeping a secret," Gilligan wrote. "A central secret. And that secret was that they felt ashamed—deeply ashamed, chronically ashamed, acutely ashamed."

Shame is a complex and destructive emotion that fundamentally alters an individual's sense of self-worth. It often triggers a desire to withdraw from society or hide one's identity. Research, such as that conducted by psychiatrist James Gilligan, suggests a significant correlation between chronic shame and the tendency toward violence. In this view, aggressive behavior can be a reactive attempt to reclaim power or self-esteem in the face of deep-seated feelings of inadequacy.

Key characteristics of shame include:

• Its tendency to fuel self-destructive tendencies.
• The social withdrawal it provages in the sufferer.
• The way it prevents individuals from admitting errors or seeking assistance.
• Its roots in early life experiences or significant trauma.
• The role of societal expectations in sustaining feelings of shame.

Recognizing the intensity of this emotion is essential for creating more humane methods of social correction and justice.

5. The justice system often employs shaming tactics, sometimes to harmful effect

"You need to figure out something that's so esoteric the expert can't possibly know about it. Maybe it's something that's not relevant to the case, but it has to be something they cannot know the answer to. They'll be incapable of saying they don't know. So they'll gradually walk down the garden to the place where they look really stupid."

Within the legal system, shaming is frequently used as a tactical tool. Lawyers may deliberately attempt to humiliate witnesses or defendants to undermine their credibility. While these methods may be effective in a courtroom setting, they often inflict significant psychological harm and do not necessarily contribute to a fair outcome.

On a systemic level, the reliance on shaming can be counterproductive. Rather than encouraging rehabilitation, it often reinforces cycles of criminal behavior and makes it more difficult for individuals to reintegrate into society.

Commonly criticized practices in the justice system include:

• Punishments centered on public humiliation.
• The use of degrading conditions or treatment for the incarcerated.
• Shame-based interrogation methods.
• The ongoing social stigmatization of individuals who have completed their sentences.

These practices raise ethical questions about the efficacy of shame as a deterrent compared to its potential for psychological damage.

6. There are alternatives to shaming that may be more effective for rehabilitation

"If shaming worked, if prison worked, then it would work," Jim said to me. "But it doesn't work."

The failure of punitive and shame-based models has led to the exploration of alternative approaches to justice. Restorative justice, for example, prioritizes the repair of harm and the healing of both the victim and the offender over mere punishment. Similarly, therapeutic communities focus on treating individuals with dignity and providing them with the tools necessary for personal growth and social reintegration.

Effective alternative models typically include:

• A focus on vocational training and education.
• Programs that address mental health and underlying trauma.
• The cultivation of empathy and interpersonal understanding.
• Opportunities for individuals to contribute meaningfully to their communities.
• Support structures designed to facilitate successful reintegration.

These methods suggest that treating individuals with respect and providing avenues for development can produce more sustainable and positive outcomes for society than shaming.

7. We must critically examine our role in online shaming culture

I'd been dismayed by the cruelty of the people who tore Jonah apart as he tried to apologize. But they weren't the mob. We were the mob.

Addressing the culture of public shaming requires honest self-reflection. It is necessary to recognize that individual participation in online criticism, even when motivated by a sense of justice, contributes to the overall power of the "mob." Understanding the underlying motivations—such as the desire for social status or the need for group belonging—is key to changing these behaviors.

Individuals should evaluate their participation by asking:

• Does this action contribute to a climate of fear?
• Is the response truly proportional to the offense?
• Has the full context and the potential for long-term damage been considered?
• Does this response leave room for the person to learn and change?

By scrutinizing these impulses, society can move toward a more measured and less destructive form of digital interaction.

8. Empathy and forgiveness are crucial in a world quick to judge and shame

"As soon as the victim steps out of the pact by refusing to feel ashamed," he said, "the whole thing crumbles."

In an environment prone to rapid judgment, empathy and forgiveness serve as vital counterweights. Empathy allows individuals to resist the impulse to join in collective shaming, while forgiveness provides a mechanism for breaking the cycle of humiliation and social exclusion. When an individual refuses to accept the shame imposed upon them, the power of the shaming dynamic is often neutralized.

Promoting a culture of empathy and forgiveness involves:

• Making a conscious effort to understand different perspectives.
• Accepting that all humans are capable of making mistakes.
• Providing space for personal growth and redemption.
• Practicing self-compassion to better extend compassion to others.
• Valuing educational outcomes over punitive ones.

Prioritizing these values helps build a more resilient society that can address social transgressions without relying on the destructive power of public shame.

Last updated: January 22, 2025